SBS Dragon Boat Paddlers - 6 billion strokes and counting

SBS Dragon Boat Paddlers - 6 billion strokes and counting

Chinese New Year festivities include the incredible spectacle of Dragon Boat racing, a colourful race where crews of 20 sprint for about 90 seconds in a blur of colour, beating drums and dragon figure heads. This year free to air TV station SBS, the media partner for the event, entered a crew of their own. And it just so happened that Mrs Fat Paddler, as an employee of SBS, was included in this crew.

SBS Paddlers - elite athletes and feared by all other dragon boat crews...

SBS Paddlers - elite athletes and feared by all other dragon boat crews...

A quick look at their pre-race session told me we were in for quite a spectacle. With two practice sessions under their belts, they were primed and ready to go. Kind of. Then their warm-up session topped it off with its chaotic yet enthusiastic series of movements, which all seemed somewhat reminiscent of float dancers from the prior evening’s Mardi Gras.

The final stretches involved a dance routine.. "Do the Hustle!"

The final stretches involved a dance routine.. "Do the Hustle!"

Finally the team scrambled off to the marshalling area to get set for their first race of the day, with their crowds of supporters lining the edges of Darling Harbour eagerly awaiting SBS’ first appearance on the water. And then it started, with the six crews paddling hard in the distance, heading directly for the crowds. The SBS paddlers looked great in their red shirts and blue visors, but their paddling hadn’t quite come together in time for the first race. In fact the waves of paddles moving out of time looked like a drunk millipede flailing it’s legs in alternating waves.

Paddles perfectly out of time!

Paddles perfectly out of time!

So in their first round, the SBS team came in a clear sixth… out of six crews! But their first outing had taught them valuable lessons and the team returned knowing what they had to do for the next race to improve their standings.

In Round 2 a completely different crew emerged, and to the cheers of their supporters, could be seen actually paddling in unison. In fact the team was paddling so well, it appeared they were starting to pass other crews!

SBS now a paddling machine, eating up their opposition

SBS now a paddling machine, eating up their opposition

Flying into the finish line, the crew realised they’d moved up from 6th to 4th. The mere fact that they were no longer the worst team made them ecstatic, the team throwing their arms and paddles into the air with a gutteral cry of victory!

Not last! BRILLIANT!!

Not last! BRILLIANT!!

And with that, our time had come to an end with other committments leading us away. Mrs Fat Paddler handed her paddle to a subsitute paddler and we were off, safe in the knowledge that the team’s vast improvement would lead them to future victory!

UPDATE: A rumour is circulating that the SBS Paddlers smashed almost all of their opposition in the third round coming in SECOND. With that rate of improvement, winning the World Championship must be next on their “To Do” list! Cheers – FP

The Fat Paddler by Sean Smith

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Byron Bay, Northern NSW (Flickr Credit: dan.proud)

Byron Bay, Northern NSW (Flickr Credit: dan.proud)

Over the past month I’ve been thinking alot about kayak camping. Not the type where you drive with a house-load of crap to a caravan park with a kayak on the roof (not that there’s anything wrong with that!), but the type where you paddle with basic camping gear in your kayak to a secret location where you can enjoy some peace and solitude either on your own or with a friend or two.

Bouddi National Park (Flickr Credit: Harlz)

Bouddi National Park, NSW (Flickr Credit: Harlz)

Fortunately I live in a vast country which has everything from tropical reefs to snow-capped mountains (and pretty much everything else in between). Even my home state of New South Wales has a vast range of different climates, geological features and wildlife, so choosing somewhere to go “commando camping” is proving to be fun by itself.

Sussex Inlet, South Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: flanno2610)

Sussex Inlet, South Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: flanno2610)

I still have plenty of time to explore all the different destinations as I slowly put together the right kit, but I thought I’d share a few pictures of locations just within my state. Who knows, maybe one day you’ll get to explore them yourself. Cheers – FP

Myall Lakes, Central Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: Jockal)

Myall Lakes, Central Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: Jockal)

Darling River, NSW Outback (Flickr Credit: Parkaboy)

Darling River, NSW Outback (Flickr Credit: Parkaboy)

Nelson Bay, Central Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: Ken_Aussie)

Nelson Bay, Central Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: Ken_Aussie)

Jervis Bay, South Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: Katie_Princess)

Jervis Bay, South Coast, NSW (Flickr Credit: Katie_Princess)

Regular visitors at Jervis Bay, NSW (Flickr Credit: Life_with_Jordy)

Regular visitors at Jervis Bay, NSW (Flickr Credit: Life_with_Jordy)

The Fat Paddler by Sean Smith

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Scarlet Woman with AC/DC horns - Rock on!

Scarlet Woman with AC/DC horns - Rock on!

Having spent Saturday night rocking-out at an AC/DC concert with good friends, a sunday paddle was always going to be a little hard. But somehow I managed to get the boat into the water on what was turning into a stinking hot afternoon. And for the first time, that waterway was Sydney’s other major harbour, Botany Bay.

Now pushing out into the bay with my flashing AC/DC horns strapped to the bow of my kayak was pretty funny in itself, especially if the looks from passing jet-skis and fishing boats were anything to go by. The somewhat green tinge of my face as I realised a hangover, the afternoon sun and soaring temperatures are not a particularly good mix was probably also funny for passing boat traffic!

But what makes Botany Bay so interesting is not fat blokes paddling horned kayaks, it’s that the runways of Sydney International Airport that are built into the Bay itself. This meant a steady array of aircraft for me to get close to.

Ooooh, pretty plane!

Ooooh, pretty plane!

Qantas, the Great Australian!

Qantas, the Great Australian!

Getting close was surprisingly easy, with only a limited exclusion zone marked out on the edges of the runways. But what was really interesting was paddling to the end of the runway and watching the planes fly in over my head, with their jet-stream adding to what was already turning into a pretty windy day on the water.

Incoming jet, almost in my sights!

Incoming jet, almost in my sights!

Flying kangaroo!

Flying kangaroo!

Almost down... here comes the jet wash!

Almost down... here comes the jet wash!

Of course as luck would have it a 20 knot head-wind kicked up for the 4km paddle back to my put-in spot, with associated chop and criss-crossing boat wake from returning fishing boats giving me a difficult and bumpy ride. As if this wasn’t exhausting enough, I had an odd experience back at the car to top the afternoon off, when an old retired Irishman who, after seeing my Greenland paddles and professing a love of the northern countries & cultures, insisted on reciting numerous verses to me from “The Songs of a Sourdough” by Robert Service! And when I say numerous, I mean numerous, with him returning on four separate occassions to recite “just another few verses”!!

In all a pretty crazy Sunday afternoon paddle for this fat fella. Cheers! – FP

The Fat Paddler by Sean Smith

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Timbo paddling along the cliff at Middle Head

Timbo paddling along the cliff at Middle Head

When Team Fat Paddler take on the Kayak for Kids event in March, the 18km route has one section that could prove tough, and that section is a rocky outcrop known as Middle Head. This spot is the junction between Middle Harbour and the main body of Sydney Harbour, and whilst inside the harbour itself, it faces directly out to sea. This means it takes the full brunt of ocean swell coming off the fabled Tasman Sea along its rocky cliff face, rebounding so that the water becomes a multi-directional lumpy zone of criss-crossing waves.

The TFP lads had once paddled out to have a look, but in some bouncy swell and without safety equipment, decided to turn back to the relative safety of Balmoral Beach. On this day, the ocean was calm and the boys decided to have a crack at paddling around the Head and back.

Alan trying to race a maxi. Neither seem to have a sail.

Alan trying to race a maxi. Neither seem to have a sail.

Grumm staring out to sea and hoping he doesn't drown today

Grumm staring out to sea and hoping he doesn't drown today

With low swell you’d think the paddle would be easy, but as the boys found out the rebound off the cliff adds a somewhat exciting dimension to the paddle.  As Sacha exclaimed bouncing about in the rebound, “this really makes you feel alive!”, and indeed he was right. The exhilaration of taking on the challenge was firing the boys up as they passed first one way and after a quick breather, turning back for another pass past the Head again.

Sacha paddling past Middle Head (with Timbo in the background)

Sacha paddling past Middle Head (with Timbo in the background)

Caves in the cliffs of Middle Head

Caves in the cliffs of Middle Head

The TFP lads conquering Middle Head

The TFP lads conquering Middle Head

Of course having beaten Middle Head, there was only one thing left to do – find coffee. So ducking around the head the lads paddled into Balmoral Beach for a hot coffee and a some friendly banter and bragging.

Four Tough Dudes - Grumm, FP, Sacha, Alan

Four Tough Dudes - Grumm, FP, Sacha, Alan

Having finished, there was nothing left to do but to enjoy the cruisy paddle back to Sydney Harbour Kayaks, stopping only for a few rock gardens along the way for a bit of “manouvering excitement” and to once again put my Adanac Rock Garden Series paddles to the test! Another day of fun for TFP over for another week, cheers boys! – FP

The Fat Paddler by Sean Smith

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Big thanks to the Twitter paddling community (and @ncoutlander in particular) for bringing this cute little video to my attention!  Now the million dollar question is… should the Fat Paddler make his own version?? Cheers! – FP

Paddle Man - Rugged, Adventurous, Chair-bound!

Paddle Man - Rugged, Adventurous, Chair-bound!

The Fat Paddler by Sean Smith

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